by T.D.A., my talented and underappreciated sister
1. Constantly take and wear others' nametags and then insist you don't know where they are.
2. Switch generic/brand name price tags.
3. Erase all expiration dates in milk cooler.
4. Count one less item than necessary for baker (11 rolls, 5 kaisers, 7 coneys, etc.)
5. Switch money backward and forward in the register
6. Knock over egg cartons and leave to rot.
7. Open all cooler doors (and leave them).
8. Carry out for customer and return 15-20 minutes later.
9. Leave one item on each aisle floor. Exchange items periodically.
10. Pour rock salt into garbage boxes.
11. Leave all recycling bags completely full.
12. Never add up hours. Complain about being shorted on paycheck.
13. Constantly refer to Shur-fine brand as Shur-as-hell-fine.
14. Replace framed, first-earned dollar bill with a note reading, "Dave, IOU one dollar."
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