7th Hell

Me: Mom, will you get me an ice cream bar?
Mom: No.

[Later]
Mom: Who was talking about the TV show 7th Heaven earlier? Now I have the theme song in my head.
Me: You know the theme song to 7th Heaven ? HA-HA!!! That's God punishing you for not getting me an ice cream bar earlier. ...Who on EARTH knows the theme song to 7th Heaven and hasn't yet committed suicide?
Mom: Well, I tape Gilmore Girls everyday and when I get home from work, I rewind the tape. 7th Heaven is on right after GG , so I'm stuck listening to it.
Me: Why, because the rewind button is the only one that works on your remote?
Mom: Well, what do *you* suggest?
Me: TBS where they are playing Seinfeld reruns at that time.
Mom: I hate Seinfeld.
Me:

[Ten minutes later]
Me: What do you mean you hate Seinfeld ? You always used to watch it.
Mom: I hate it.
Me: What are you TALKING about? You like Seinfeld.
Mom: I have a rule with myself where if I turn the TV on and Seinfeld 's on, I have to change the channel before anyone speaks.
Me: But what about Must-See-TV night that we all watched every Thursday all the time I was in high school??? You liked it then! Mom...
Mom: Nope.
Me: I swear you makes these things up just to make sure I'm still listening to you.
[She begins to read and ignore me.]

Me [Ten minutes later, unable to let this go]: I think we've lost sight of what that conversation was about. So Seinfeld is worse than 7th Heaven ?
Mom [Horrified]: NOOO!!!! [Pause] Well, yeah.
Me: [Several octaves higher than usual]: WHAT?!?
Mom: I would never actually watch 7th Heaven.
Me: And yet you know the theme song.
Mom: [Singing the theme song]: 7th heaven...