Office Space: the Miss Rixie edition

Office Space: the Miss Rixie edition

So fellow readers, I am back at my summer position: interning in my dad's office. In case you missed out on the fun of last summer's work, let me direct you to the following blogs:

Friday, 27 June 2003
Tuesday, 14 July 2003
Thursday, 14 August 2003

Aah, good times, good times.

Usually I'm in a rather large office, but one or two days a week I'll be in a smaller office. One of my first experiences at Office B happened today. Office B is so small that all three of us in the office--yes, you heard right, all THREE--can hear exactly what the other two are saying, doing, and thinking. This has cut into the considerable time usually devoted to internet "research" (entertainment news) and personal emailing.

So the three of us in this office today are me, my dad, and this guy whose code name will be Norm. I chose Norm because that is his actual name. Everyone in Office A knows Norm is really lazy and doesn't do anything ever. However, Norm is the only full-time person who works in Office B. Everyone else from Office A stops by once or twice a week, but has their real office in building A in a completely different town.

Consequently, Norm never has anyone checking up on him and even when other people are there, he feels no need to change his usual daily routine. Here is what he's done in the last two hours: taken his wife to a doctor's appointment, gone to the bathroom with a newspaper for about twenty minutes (maybe twenty-five--men are so weird. Can you imagine disappearing for a half hour AT WORK while everyone knows you're just taking a crap?? I mean, he took a newspaper, for Pete's sake), smoked a cigarette, talked to a guy about how much work he has that he doesn't want to do, smoked another cigarette with this guy, made a personal phone call, made another personal phone call, shut off his computer and restarted it, and then, oh yes, smoked ANOTHER cigarette. Plus, he lights up before he goes outside, so I smell it. My hair will probably smell like smoke by the end of the day. Sheesh. Oh now, I hear him rattling a newspaper. I wonder if he reads Foxtrot.

Course, I shouldn't talk. Here's what I've done in the last hour: driven to a gas station to buy Diet Coke, eaten a piece of chocolate cake, written a resume, entered some case notes, thought about going to the bathroom and then decided I didn't want to go in there after Norm, wrote an email to a friend, lost said email to friend, considered rewriting email to friend, then reconsidered and wrote email to sister. Oh yeah, and complained to my dad about how I'm bored and want to go home. He said, "Eat some cake." I said, "Okay," considerably cheered. Yum! There's another woman that works in this office. Her name is Audrey and I like her a lot. The reasons for this are threefold.
1) She called me adorable.
2) Last Thursday she brought doughnuts and today she brought cake.
3) She also thinks Norm is a tool.

Just wanted to let you know--Norm was NOT reading the newspaper, he's reading a Tom Clancy thriller and just informed me that Tom Clancy is one ugly dude. Considering that not ten minutes ago, Norm told some guy, "It's so hot in here, my armpits are mildewing," I'm not exactly thinking Norm is attractive enough to pass judgment.

[Sidebar to my father]: Dad if you are reading this: I'm totally joking, I was busy the whole afternoon ... except for those times when you looked over and saw that I was not.