While playing Apples To Apples:
Sister: I got something and I don't know what it is.
Brother: Well, you'd better ask your doctor.
Student: Hey, Miss A, it's not premarital sex if you never intend on getting married.
After I described The Scarlet Letter to my eleventh graders:
Student: That sounds really good!
Me (to myself): I told it ... wrong!
During class debate--the situation is You are a soldier in the Middle East. You've been ordered to cover your troop from higher ground while they make their way down a mountain. Your C.O. orders you to shoot anyone who looks suspicious. You see an old woman all by herself a few hundred yards from the rest of your troop. She is not walking but does not appear to be a spy. Do you follow your CO's orders and shoot her even if it turns out she may be innocent?
Student #1: You shoot her first, ask questions later.
Student #2: That's ridiculous. You can't just go around shooting people.
Student #1: Why not?
Student #2: Well, because then you're just Dick Cheney.
While watching Mamma Mia, one of the characters asks another, "Why haven't you ever gotten married?"
Mom: Isn't it obvious? She's a lesian.
